He will texting you again
He will calling you again
He will looking for you again
If he serious
If he really wants you
If he wont lost you
You didn’t make relationship with him right
So it still his responsibility to fight for you
To get you
Remember you worth it
You are valued
You deserved to fight for
Don’t asking too much
If he serious he will fight
And you deserved to fight for
You are valued
- HS
29/11/23
“Fa tapi muka lo gakaya orang depresi”
“Orang kaya lo gamungkin ansos”
“Sumpah gue juga BPD tapi pas gue liat lo gak kaya orang BPD”
Alhamdulillah kalo gue masih sekuat itu di mata kalian, cuma yang paling tau & kenal diri gue, ya gue…
Dari kecil udah ngelakuin self harm & sekarang gue sering merasa putus asa sama hidup
Gue hidup buat apa sih?
Tujuannya apa sih?
Kenapa harus gue yang ngalamin ini semua?
Boleh gak orang lain aja?
Kenapa dari sekian banyak masalah dapetnya malah penyakit mental?
Tau gak sih ngelawan diri sendiri tuh susah banget?
Hikmahnya apa sih seorang Haifasalwa punya BPD?
Buat sembuh? Buat bantu orang lain sembuh juga?
22/11/23
Actually I'm not in the good mentally and physically
I will trying my best to survive
I've been watching Maudy Ayunda videos about "Stress Management" she explained three things how's to relief stress
The first one: Self Awareness
I have to be aware what things that makes me stress, don't wait until you got into burn out phase
And I did... I'm ignored all the things when I'm in stress phase for a years, now, I'm in burn out phase and I'm MESSED UP
I often to blaming my self, feel guilty for all the bad things happened, however I have to realize this is the phase after a stressful years happened without control
I should have to enjoy it
But it takes a long time me to survive in burn out phase
I have to survive
I have to be strong
I have to force my self to changed
Better.
The second one: Be present
Simple things such as reading a book, journaling, and avoiding the phones
And I'm proud of my self I've been do that before Maudy Ayunda told me hahaha #IKnowImCool
So, for the next InsyaAllah I will read a journal actually it can helps my thesis and the journal quite interesting becase it's about Public Relations
The last one, Maudy Ayunda told me to do Action Plan
Actually I won't force my self too hard like before so I just want to create small to do list that will impacts on me (especially on my thesis progress haha)
I will read 1 chapter every day about Public Relations! Bismillah, InsyaAllah
I want my old Salwa comeback
Be better
Be stronger
I'm proud of you
Bismillah, you can through this! It will pass!
